Why do I only feel the need to post when I'm depressed?

*sigh* Again, a post filled with depression. Today was good!....until not too long ago. My girlfriend was acting like I was sick with the plague. She was acting like something horrible had happened but wouldn't tell me what! All she said was "Stop messaging me." I over reacted like usual, and now I am crying and wishing I had just left well enough alone. *sigh* Jeez, I'm too depressed to even finish this entry, even after hijacking my dad's laptop to do it! Hopefully things will be better tomorrow... ;_;

Might get thrown out.

Might get thrown out. Dad just threatened to. Little does he know, I know my rights. If he was serious, he still has to deal with me for a month before he can legally force me to leave.

**Sigh** Sometimes I just feel like crap.

So, this is my first blog post ever, and it's already going to be on a low note. So I'll start from the beginning. Three months ago, I got into the first relationship of my life, had my first kiss, and officially got a girlfriend. Things have been great!.....for the most part... We both have our own little quirks: I am very affectionate, she isn't, for one thing. We have managed to work through our differences throughout these past three months, but she seems a little different lately. She has mood swings (or at least that's what they seem like to me) more often than usual, being happy or neutral one moment, and sad, annoyed, or angry the next. When we're talking, she simply tells me that she's in a bad mood. When I ask her what's wrong she flat out does not answer, she simply says she'll talk to me later. Before she goes, I tell her I love her, but she completely ignores me. I know she loves me, but when she does this, it hurts. When she refuses to answer when I ask what's wrong, it makes me feel like she doesn't think she can trust me, which makes me feel like I'm useless. I want to be there for her when somethings wrong, but it just feels like she never wants me to anymore. Then, when she doesn't respond when I tell her I love her, it makes me feel like I'm at fault, and that tears me up. I feel like I've hurt her and let her down, so I get pulled into misery and self-hatred. I LOVE this woman! I can honestly see a future with her! That's why it hurts so bad! Granted, I'm not the best either. Apparently, I've been clingy, so I've been trying to dial it back. I'm also prone to freak-outs when I'm afraid that something has gone wrong in the relationship. One night I called her twenty times, which I'll never do again. I love her, but sometimes I'm not sure what path we're headed down anymore...